And never mind the beautiful mystery（心中永遠而美麗的謎）

It was the silliest incident that brought Nannette into my life. I had been in my local supermarket and spent more than I should. When I reached the checkout girl I remarked, jokingly, that my money was all gone after I had paid for all the articles. On my way out through the main doors a girl suddenly appeared and asked me, that if I was really short of cash, she was willing to lend me some, in order for me to get home. I was very surprised and she was a rather attractive looking girl. Now, as it was hardly an everyday experience, having a gorgeous girl appear out of thin air and offer me money.
　　I quickly pulled myself together, "No. Yes thank you. But I was only joking; I do have some change indoors for my taxi fare. But please, would you let me take you for some tea and cakes, there's rather a nice restaurant quite close?"
　　"I'm sorry, I can't just now. I just don't have time. But I go to the town library every Thursday. I could meet you outside. Say at two o'clock? My name is Nannette by the way. What's yours?"
　　"Yes. Oh, my name is Edmond, but please call me Ed, most people do."
　　I held out my hand and grasped a small, delicate and very female hand. Then, after this most unconventional of introductions—she was gone. Just how I would have been able to pay for tea and cakes, considering my lack of funds, was a question I failed to consider in the excitement of the moment. But that is how I first met Nannette.
　　Our first meeting for tea was just a few days later. I was standing outside the library for ten minutes before she came running up sharp on two o'clock.
　　"Oh, hello Edmond, I mean, Ed. Do you know somewhere we can go? Have you been waiting long?"
　　I noticed that she was carrying two rather large books. She seemed slightly breathless and she gave me the impression that she was somewhat frail. Apart from the books she held an elegant and seemingly expensive, if a little old fashioned, handbag. She wore over her shoulders a short, black cloak or cape, edged with a delicate sky blue motif.
　　"Yes. No, there is a rather good place about fifty yards away."
　　My words stumbled out something like that in my attempt to answer her confused questioning. There was indeed a small establishment a little way off, a couple of paces down a side street. It was more like one of those numerous little refreshment places that one tends to see in small seaside towns; that are generally run by two spinster sisters. Gothic white script above the premises proclaimed: Black an White Tea Room.
　　We went in and sat by a small table set for two by the window. The place was completely empty and seemed unusually quite. The noise and traffic in the busy street outside was barely distinguishable.
　　As I sat there for those first few moments with Nannette, I had a chance to really observe her. Her face was pale and her eyes were largish and a sort of amber colour. I would have said she was wearing little makeup if any at all. I could not help thinking that her face indicated some suffering or adversity. There was something else, I was puzzled for a while, and then I recalled those words of Edgar Allen Poe: "There is nothing of Beauty that does not have some strangeness about it".
　　"Well, Nannette, judging by those great tomes you are struggling with, we have something in common. I have my own small collection of antiquarian books and first editions my self".
　　A small, elderly woman appeared and we placed an order for a pot of tea and a plate of cream and chocolate cakes. She bustled off and the conversation resumed. She listened to me running on about books and authors, valuable and rare editions I had found and sold. Nannette's replies surprised and delighted me, she seemed so knowledgeable, although this seemed rather precocious in one so apparently young. She seemed to possess a detailed understanding of the causes and development of the English Civil War. Her comprehension of 17th. Century England and the life of Charles the First was somewhat astonishing, not to say a little uncanny. There was no doubt that she knew her subject inside out, as my questions concerning some of the major battles of the era and dates drew out. Several times during our conversation she would suddenly say, "What is the time, Ed.? I don't have much time."
　　I would glance at my watch and our conversation continued. After she had asked me this same question several times I asked her, "What do you do, Nannettee?"
　　There seemed to be a far away look in her eyes and some sadness when she replied, "Oh, I just look after people."
　　"I see. You must be a nurse." I remember remarking.
　　"I just care for people. But Ed, I really must go. I don't have much time."
　　Her repeated remark made me glance again at my watch and say, "It has just gone four o'clock Nannette."
　　Moments later we were on the pavement outside. I touched her hand, she smiled, and then she was gone. So for several months we met at two outside the library, went to the quaint old tea-room, had tea and cakes and talked into the late afternoon. However, sooner or later the topic came around to the 17th. Century, The English Civil War, and of then, always Charles the First. On every occasion she always mentioned that she had not much time, more than once during the course of an afternoon. Apart from her seemingly obsession about time and my curiosity as to what she actually did; when she would always reply that she; looked after people, or she cared for people: I believe that a genuine affection grew between us.
　　And so it was every Thursday, or sometimes Tuesday, until my accident and my four months in hospital and the complications after surgery. I knew of course that I would never see Nannette again—in this life at any rate. Many months later when I was well on in my recovery, I noticed in a second-hand bookshop, a paperback book in a box of cheap, discarded historical romances. The title on the cover was "Nannette". The book was mostly rot, I knew that, but it was founded on historical fact. It was a tale of how a delicate, but strikingly beautiful and intelligent girl, from an apparently quite good family, was brought up in poverty, became a mistress to a king, and how at last she was cruelly rejected in turbulent times after gaining great wealth. She died in poverty in Paris after using what wealth and influence she had in saving the children of Loyalists from the wroth of Cornwall. There was also a description in the novel of Nannette, the heroine. As I read it, I recalled my first afternoon sitting in the tea-room with my Nannette: there could be no mistake—it was she. I hurled the book from me and never opened it again.
　　Many months later I returned to the library and made my way slowly back to that side street where the tea-room was. I don't know what I expected to see, but the place was all boarded-up and there were shutters over the windows. I never went back. Now, whenever I see a book concerning anything to do with the last half of 17th Century England, I feel nothing but a sense of repulsion. The period never had any great appeal to me anyway. I sometimes recall my afternoons with Nannette, and go over in my mind our conversations. But it is all a mystery to me. But then, what do I know? What does anyone know? I only know there are some things we can never understand—and, perhaps that is the best for us.
　　一次極傻的意外讓蘭麗緹闖進了我的生活。那天我在附近的一家超市裏大肆采購，不知不覺超出了預算。結賬時我開玩笑地和售貨員小姐說，付完款後我可是一分錢都不剩了。在我往超市大門走去的時候，一個女孩突然攔住我，說如果我真的沒有錢的話，她可以借錢給我回家。我當時很驚訝，而她也長得很好看。一個迷人的小姐從天而降要借錢給我，我想這種好事我可不能天天都撞上。
　　不過我很快回過神來。“啊！不用了，謝謝你。
　　我剛才只是在開玩笑。我還有一些零錢，足夠打的士回家的了。但是，不知道我有沒有這個機會，邀請你去喝下午茶呢？這附近有一家很不錯的餐廳。”
　　“哦，很抱歉，現在不行，我沒有時間。但是每個周四的下午我都會去社區圖書館，我可以在圖書館門口等你。兩點鐘怎麽樣？我叫蘭麗緹，你呢？”
　　“哦，我叫艾德蒙，但是叫我艾德就行了，大家都這麽叫我。”
　　說完我就和她握手告別，可以感受到她的手非常嬌小柔嫩。就在這次極不尋常的偶遇之後，她走了。其實當時我口袋裏已經沒剩幾個錢，怎麽為下午茶付帳都是個問題，但是當時我實在太興奮了，也根本沒有想到過這個問題。這就是我認識蘭麗緹的全過程。
　　幾天後，我們第一次正式會面，一起喝下午茶。我在圖書館門口等了十分鐘，在兩點鐘左右看到她匆匆忙忙地跑了過來。
　　“你好，艾德蒙，哦，不，艾德，你知道有什麽地方我們可以去嗎？你等了很久嗎？”
　　我留意到她拿了兩本厚厚的書，走得有點氣喘籲籲，給我一種很虛弱的感覺。除了書，她還提著一個款式優雅，看起來價值不菲，但是不算新潮的手提包。她披著一件短短的鑲天藍色邊的黑鬥篷。
　　“是的。哦，不是，附近有家不錯的餐廳，離這大概五十碼左右。”
　　回答她那一連串的問題令我有點結結巴巴。附近橫街上的那家餐廳，有點像那種海邊小鎮上提供小吃和飲料的小店，走幾步就到了。餐廳由一對未婚的老姐妹經營，墻上有一行哥德式的字體寫著：“黑白茶室”。
　　我們走進茶室，選了一張靠窗的兩人桌坐下。店裏沒有其他顧客，出乎尋常地安靜，幾乎聽不見窗外車來人往的喧囂。
　　坐下來後，我有片刻的時間仔細打量蘭麗緹。她臉色蒼白，眼睛挺大的，琥珀色，幾乎完全沒有化妝。我總覺得她的臉掩藏著某種痛苦或者不幸，還有其他東西。一剎那間我覺得有點迷惑，想起了艾德加·艾倫坡的那句詩：“沒有一種美麗的事物是不帶點陌生感的。”
　　“蘭麗緹，從你閱讀的那些大部頭看來，我們有一些共同點。我也收集了不少古書和初版書。”
　　這時一位身材瘦小、上了年紀的女人走了過來，我們點了壺茶，一碟奶油和巧克力蛋糕。女人走開後，我們繼續談話。蘭麗緹聽著我滔滔不絕地評論各種書、作家，和找到過或出售過的珍稀版書籍。蘭麗緹的回應令我又驚又喜，以她的年紀，她出人意料外地知書達理。她似乎對 英國內戰的來龍去脈尤其熟識，對十七世紀英格蘭和查裏一世之了解更加令我驚嘆，甚至覺得有點不可思議。我的問題涉及到那些時代的部分主要戰爭和具體日期，可見她對那段歷史了解得十分透徹。好幾次在我們的談話過程中，她突然問：“艾德，幾點了？我沒多少時間了。”
　　通常我會看看表，然後繼續我們的話題。在她再問了同一個問題幾次後，我問她：“你是做什麽的，蘭麗緹？”
　　這時她的目光顯得迷蒙，甚至有點憂傷：“哦，就是照顧別人。”
　　“我懂了，你一定是護士。”我記得自己這樣說。
　　“就是照顧人而已。艾德，我真的得走了。我沒有多少時間了。”
　　我再看看表，說：“才剛過四點，蘭麗緹。”
　　後來我們走出茶室，在人行道上告別。我握住她的手，她笑了笑，走了。在接下來的幾個月裏，我們總在圖書館外碰頭，然後還是去那家茶室喝茶、聊天，直至傍晚。可是，每次談著談著，話題總會繞回到十七世紀、英國內戰和查理一世。每次她都會重復幾次說她沒有多少時間了。除了她對時間的執著，以及我對她的職業的好奇(每次她總說自己從事照顧別人的工作)之外，我相信我們之間有一種真摯的感情在滋長。
　　於是我們在每個星期四，有時是星期二見面，直到我出了一次意外，花了四個月的時間入院動手術和治療並發癥。我知道我和蘭麗緹此生不會再見了。又過了許多個月，我已經逐漸康復，一次偶爾在一家二手書店一個裝滿廉價古老愛情小說的箱子裏，看到一本名為《蘭麗緹》的平裝書。我可以看出書的內容並不怎麽樣，但卻是根據史實撰寫的。故事講述一個纖細但是異常美麗和智慧的女孩，來自一個有教養的家庭，在貧窮中被撫養成人，後來成為國王的情婦，獲得巨額財富，卻在那動蕩的年代殘酷地不容於世。為了從盛怒的康華裏候爵手中救出效忠派的後代，她耗盡了自己的財富和權勢，最後貧困交加死在巴黎。書中還有一段對女主角蘭麗緹的說明。在我閱讀說明的時候，我想起了和我的蘭麗緹第一次在茶室裏見面的情景：不會錯了，一定是她。我把書丟掉，再沒有翻開。
　　又過了許多個月，我重新來到圖書館，慢慢地步行至那家茶室。我也不知道自己希望看到什麽，但是那個地方已經全部裝上了擋板，窗戶也掛起百葉窗簾。從此以後我再沒回去了。現在，每當看到任何有關十七世紀英格蘭的書，我都會很抵觸，反正我對那段歷史一向不大感興趣。有時候我也會想起那些和蘭麗緹一起度過的下午，回憶我們的談話。但一切都成了一個謎。我知道多少？我們每個人又知道多少？我只知道有些事情是我們永遠無法理解的，但這對我們可能是最好的。